Thursday, July 18, 2013

Why I Hated 50 Shades of Grey.

Anastasia Steele is a naive soon to be college graduate who is volunteered, by her roommate, to interview a young sexy billionaire (Christian Grey), who is an alumni of their university. Christian becomes fascinated by Anastasia and begins to invite her into his world which is shocking yet intriguing to Anastasia.  At first their relationship is more of a business relationship, complete with contracts but slowly (ish) in evolves into a love affair. 
 E.L. James wrote Fifty Shades of Grey as Twilight fan fiction, I have never read Twilight (and never will) so I have no idea how closely these books follow the Twilight storyline.  However, these are erotic novels, which obviously the Twilight series were not.  They are the first erotic novels I have read and quite possibly the last.  
Sadly I wasted $30.00 to read this Fifty Shades on my Kindle and well at least a couple hours.  I hated them.  So, if I hated them so much why did I read them all?  I got sucked into the story, I wanted to see how preposterous it could get and how annoying.  The basic story was entertaining enough, however, the speed in which everything progressed was a bit perplexing.  In the span of about three months or a summer Anastasia and Christian embark on a whirlwind romance(?) and much more.   Lets just say a lot happens.  
Fifty Shades of Grey reads like it was written by a horny teenager, the writing is cliche, repetitive and just plain bad.  I would think that if you wrote erotic novels you would be good at finding new ways to describe sexual acts, E. L. James is not.  And for being fifty shades of #@&*ed up, Christian Grey becomes quite predictable.  Anastasia for her part is shockingly naive for a women in her early 20s.  I was sick of reading how his words became her undoing.   Additionally, you would have to be a billionaire with a full house staff in order to have that much time to have sex, no normal person has that amount of free time on their hands.  
The second most irritating part of the book was Anastasia's inner goddess's constant antics.  Nobody cared if it was doing back flips or stretched out on a chaise lounge or what other stupid things it did.  It needed to take a flying leap off a cliff.  
Ultimately,  what I hated the most about these books was the idea the Ana's love could fix Christian and %*$#'d up ways.  This was not a love story, it was a young girl being manipulated and used by a control freak who had some serious issues.  It makes me sad that women are swooning over Christian Grey and fantasizing about having a lifestyle like this.  I can't wait to read the sequel where there is a bitter divorce and many many years of therapy for Ana.  
If you want a trashy beach read, read Fifty Shades.  If you want to see what not to look for in a boyfriend read Fifty Shades. If you are looking to spice up your marriage buy some sexy undies.   If your looking for a well written engaging novel avoid this like the plague.  I gave the series one star on Good Reads.

Boxed Set, 1664 pages
Published June 12th 2012 by Vintage Books (first published January 1st 2012)
034580404X (ISBN13: 9780345804044)
edition language

1 comment:

  1. I haven't read FSoG, but I have read enough reviews and spoilers. This book is so infuriatingly bad! I mean, the idea of romanticizing an abusive relationship is terrible as it is! I don't think I'll enjoy reading this book, and I can totally understand why you wouldn't.


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